I arrived in Tarragona on saturday afternoon. I had arranged to be picked up there by my workaway host where I was going to work for 10 days. In Tarragona I met my two colleagues, Daniel and Sarah, and host Christian at the trainstation. They were already a little tipsy and unsure about my response to their present state. I was ok with the drinking in general but certainly after they explained it was their one day a week off and away from the finca. What I did find difficult was the German.
I was asked in advance by Christian if I understood and spoke German as all three are German natives. As a Dutch Amsterdam girl I always kind of expect people to speak english with each other, when someone not speaking the same language is around (sometimes going in the extremes when a table of ten Dutch with one English just switch continuously, very confusing when you’re working as a waitress). Of course I learned again that this is only done by Dutch people or metropolitain expats. It was tiring to try and follow the conversations and I felt like an outsider from the onset. Not because they were not nice or engaging people, on the contrary I really liked them and they where very funny (apparantly), but because I did not follow the jokes or conversations at all. The other reason, I found out later, was that Sarah and Daniel where both at the finca for 2 weeks already and had become close friends in that time.
Over all that Saturday in Terragona was nice, we saw some nice places and ended up with a refreshing and fun dive in the mediterranean, with Christian wearing one of my shorts as swimming trunks. We did some shopping in a huuuuge supermercado and were home late. It was raining properly when we arrived at the finca and Christian showed me to my little hideaway in the rainy dark on a wild bit of the land. I was tired, wet and highly doubting the positive aspects of my choice that night lying in my tent. But as with all things of this travel that start out bumpy, in the end it was a great opportunity for personal growth, fun and finding meaning.
Christian and his wife’s piece of land encompasses two olive farm fincas. It lies in a small valley just below the mountains in between many other pieces of land with also many many olive trees. From the main house you can see Tortosa, and the sea behind it, to the south a gorgeous mountain range to the west and north and wide stretched land to the east. On the grounds, which they own for 4years now, they build a yoga house, outside fully functioning bathroom, a tiny house, an African tent hut, and they have two caravans for people to sleep in. Outside the msin house is a small pool with the best views, a fully functioning outdide kitchen and a really cool set-up for outside movie watching.
After a few days of good work on the house in the morning and very peacefull afternoons hanging out by the pool or in the yoga hoise I decided to go for a hike on my own. Wow! The mountains there can compete in wildness and feeling of space with the Trossachs and the paths are amazingly well laid. I learned in Scotland that it is hard to create and maintain mountain paths that both keep the feeling of wildness and adventure while at the same time remaining safe and easy to follow. Ever wondered who lays and maintains these paths, and how they do it?
Anyway. During these walks I adressed my growing negativity towards my host and colleagues for ‘shutting me out’ by speaking German all the time and not actively engaging in their jokes and conversations. I was often judging them for not being ‘conscious’ enough, not sensitive to my feelings or just being plain mean! I found the source of these negative thought patterns in my own, and old, insecurities and fears of not fitting in, childhood groups I was not allowed to join, and being too young to understand a lot of things because I was the youngest sibling. Luckily I had experienced recently that the only ‘cure’ for this is consistently answering all anger, judgements or fears of my inner child with self love. So my mantra with any and all of these negativities became “I love you”. And POOF!
I had sooooo much fun on those last 4 to 5 days of my 10 day stay. We watched Life of Brian and Out of Africa (with Merryl Streep) dubbed in German, something that the Anglophyle in me cringed at. I laughed until I cried at the first and cried during the latter. The last 3 days I was alone with Daniel and Christian. Because now one third of the group was me the conversations where in English more and more and I really felt connected and close to these two wonderful human beings! They are actually very conscious and cool guys. Christian being the ultimate gentleman and life enjoyer, with many travels and adventures in his past and having the polite habits and understatement humour of an upper class englishman. Daniel being a man of 29 with a big story, of which he only reveiled some in the last two days, and a much bigger heart! A kind, tough but soft bear with lots of wisdom and just not a lot of English.
I was sad to go in the end, but this was the best I could hope for. I learned so much in those 10 days and truly felt physically and emotionally stronger after it. Also my German was back at the level of highschool but unfortunatly my next stop was France so… ah well C’est la Vie, n’est pas?
In Love with People 